The Key to Unlocking Favor: Understanding True Forgiveness

The Key to Unlocking Favor: Understanding True Forgiveness

Have you ever felt stuck in a cycle of hurt and unforgiveness? Perhaps you've tried to forgive someone who wounded you deeply, but somehow the pain keeps resurfacing. What if I told you that true forgiveness is more than just saying the words "I forgive you"? What if there's a key that unlocks not only freedom from past hurts but also opens the door to God's favor in your life?

I recently witnessed something extraordinary in Rwanda that completely transformed my understanding of forgiveness. This revelation has the power to change your life too.

The Power of Focus: Why We Get Stuck in Suffering

One of the main reasons we suffer is because we're focused on ourselves. The human mind is built for survival - it naturally looks for what's wrong to avoid danger. When you're self-focused, you'll always find a problem.

If you want a different life right now, trade your expectations for appreciation. You can't be in gratitude and pity at the same time. True thankfulness is a benchmark sign that you've come through your suffering season.

Why Can't We See God's Grace in Our Trials?

The issue isn't that God isn't present in our difficulties - it's that our focus is in the wrong place. When you stand in front of your problem, all you can see is the problem. You can't see the Lord.

You have two options:

• Push your problem to the side

• Change your perspective and position

When your eyes are fixed on the one who wounded you, you'll never be able to see God's grace. You cannot experience all of life - you can only experience the life you focus on.

What Does True Forgiveness Actually Mean?

The etymology of forgiveness in Old English comes from "for-giefan" where the prefix means "completely" or "thoroughly" and the second part means "to give." Forgiveness isn't just letting something go - it's giving completely. We must give up our offenses, our right to justice, our right for vengeance, and our right to be offended.

In Hebrew, there are three different words for forgiveness, each revealing a different aspect of this powerful act:

The Three Steps of Biblical Forgiveness

• Salah (סָלַח) - God's unique act of pardoning guilt. This is forgiveness that must come from God himself. Jesus demonstrated this when he said, "Father, forgive them."

• Nasa (נָשָׂא) - To lift, carry, or bear. This is where we lift the burden of offense so the relationship can move forward.

• Kipper (כִּפֶּר) - To cover or atone. This is where love covers the relational breach that was created by the offense.

Colossians 3:13-14 outlines these three steps: "Bear with one another and forgive one another... just as the Lord forgave you, so you also must do. And above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection."

The Rwanda Revelation: How Forgiveness Unlocks Favor

Rwanda experienced one of the worst genocides in human history in 1994. Yet today, it has the fastest growing GDP in Africa and is one of the most developed nations on the continent. Why? Their national motto is "We must forgive to move forward."

I heard stories that would make your blood boil:

• A man whose children were killed by their own uncles forgave his wife's family

• People who now live next door to those who killed their family members

• A minister who bulldozed a church building on 2,000 congregants who were hiding inside

Yet they have forgiven completely. They work together, they've restored relationships, and some have even married into families that once sought to destroy them.

The result? Their nation is blessed and walks in favor. Forgiveness unlocks favor. As Jesus said, "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy."

Why Unforgiveness Blocks God's Blessings

Job 42:10 tells us, "The Lord restored the fortunes of Job when he prayed for his friends." Job didn't receive double blessing until he prayed for those who had cursed him.

What if your blessing is waiting on the other side of your prayers for those who have hurt you?

2 Corinthians 2:10-11 reveals that unforgiveness gives Satan an advantage over us: "Now whom you forgive anything, I also forgive... so that no advantage would be taken of us by Satan, for we are not ignorant of his devices."

Forgiveness isn't weakness - it's warfare. Every time you forgive, you slam the door in the devil's face.

Are You Punishing the Wrong People?

Some of us are punishing people today for the sins of somebody else yesterday. That's why we can't form close bonds with anyone. We claim we're traumatized, but often we're just in unforgiveness. That's where trauma lives.

As long as you're punishing somebody else because you're traumatized by somebody in your past, you can't access the favor of your future. You remain poisoned by your past.

Life Application

Forgiveness is a three-step process that may take time to walk through completely:

• Ask God to pardon those who have hurt you: "Father, forgive them."

• Release the offense yourself: "I forgive them."

• Cover the breach with love: "Lord, help me to love them again."

This week, I challenge you to identify one person you need to forgive completely. Work through these three steps, understanding that it's a process. You may not be able to complete all three steps immediately, and that's okay.

Ask yourself:

• Who am I still holding an offense against?

• Which step of forgiveness am I stuck on with this person?

• What blessings and favor might I be missing because of my unforgiveness?

• How would my relationships improve if I learned to forgive like the Rwandans?

Remember, thanksgiving gets you to the gate, praise brings you into the court, but forgiveness brings you into freedom and favor - a pathway that carries you closer to the Father's heart. Some of you are praying for blessing, but the lock is bitterness. Forgiveness is the only key that fits.